Oooo-la-not so much-la

Today's blog topic was inspired by an email to my friend and soon-to-be-published author, Jennifer Shirk. I told her, "...I didn't insert the love scene. I just don't want to go there, though I know I need to. I'm sorry, but you just have to be in the mood to write that stuff. Plus, you need privacy. And I mean PRIVACY. You can't have your husband sitting 10 feet away watching the NFL playoffs. You can't have your seven-year-old bopping in and out asking about when he has to go to bed (NOW! I said NOW!) or your ten-year-old asking when she can get on the computer. (Tomorrow, dammit!)

You can't have a cold, or heartburn or a pile of socks to be sorted and folded. You need the atmosphere to write a sexy scene for imaginary people, but not feel like you're writing porn. (!)..."

Later, as I sorted and folded socks, I thought about it some more and realized why I really couldn't write the necessary between-the-sheets scene. It's got nothing to do with being in "the" mood. And though I've read articles that tell you how to get into the mood for writing a love scene (drink a glass of wine, scatter rosepetals, light scented candles, take a bubble bath, wear a sexy nightie, pop some Viagra, etc.) I realized that none of those things will help. The reason is because I'm not writing about sex (no matter what my husband thinks). I'm writing about my characters connecting to one another on an emotional level.

So, I don't need to feel sexy to write the luuuv scene. I need to feel emotional. And not just emotional about my love life (or lack of one, especially during NFL playoffs). I have to be able to zone in on each of my characters' deepest, most intimate feelings. It's not just writing the word penis that's difficult. Or the ability to find a new euphamism for climax that's hard. It's being able to get so into my characters' heads (and bodies) that I'm feeling everything--emotionally as well as physically.

Writing is such a schizophrenic activity.

Anyhow, I'm going to put away the lingerie and the rose petals, and try and figure out how to get into JP and Emma's hearts. The nice thing is--I've realized that no matter what people say about romance, I'm not writing porn. That's more of a insert tab b into slot a exercise.

Yuck.

So...what do you do to get into your characters heads, hearts and--beds?